08.27.2013

Any kid will run any errand for you, if you ask at bedtime. -Red Skelton State Mottos Alabama Hell Yes, We Have Electricity Alaska 11,623 Eskimos Can't Be Wrong! Arizona But It's A Dry Heat Arkansas Literacy Ain't Everything California By 30, Our Women Have More Plastic Than Your Honda Colorado If You Don't Ski, Don't Bother Connecticut Like Massachusetts, Only The Kennedy's Don't Own It - Yet Delaware We Really Do Like The Chemicals In Our Water Florida Ask Us About Our Grandkids Georgia We Put The "Fun" In Fundamentalist Extremism Hawaii Haka Tiki Mou Sha'ami Leeki Toru (Death To Mainland Scum, But Leave Your Money) Idaho More Than Just Potatoes... Well Okay, We're Not, But The Potatoes Sure Are Real Good Illinois Please Don't Pronounce the "S" Indiana 2 Billion Years Tidal Wave Free Iowa We Do Amazing Things With Corn Kansas First Of The Rectangle States Kentucky Five Million People; Fifteen Last Names Louisiana We're Not ALL Drunk Cajun Wackos, But That's Our Tourism Campaign Maine We're Really Cold, But We Have Cheap Lobster Maryland If You Can Dream It, We Can Tax It Massachusetts Our Taxes Are Lower Than Sweden's (For Most Tax Brackets) Michigan First Line Of Defense From The Canadians Minnesota 10,000 Lakes... And 10,000,000,000,000 Mosquitoes Mississippi Come And Feel Better About Your Own State Missouri Your Federal Flood Relief Tax Dollars At Work Montana Land Of The Big Sky, The Unabomber, Right-Wing Crazies, And Very Little Else Nebraska Ask About Our State Motto Contest Nevada Hookers and Poker! New Hampshire Go Away And Leave Us Alone New Jersey You Want A ##$%##! Motto? I Got Yer ##$%##! Motto Right Here! New Mexico Lizards Make Excellent pets New York You Have The Right To Remain Silent, You Have The Right To An Attorney.... North Carolina Tobacco Is A Vegetable North Dakota We Really Are One Of The 50 States! Ohio At Least We're Not Michigan Oklahoma Like The Play, Only No Singing Oregon Spotted Owl... It's What's For Dinner Pennsylvania Cook With Coal Rhode Island We're Not REALLY An Island South Carolina Remember The Civil War? We Didn't Actually Surrender South Dakota Closer Than North Dakota Tennessee The Educashun State Texas Si' Hablo Ing'les Utah Our Jesus Is Better Than Your Jesus Vermont Yep Virginia Who Says Government Stiffs And Slackjaw Yokels Don't Mix? Washington Help! We're Overrun By Nerds And Slackers! Washington, D.C. Wanna Be Mayor? West Virginia One Big Happy Family... Really! Wisconsin Come Cut The Cheese Wyoming Where Men Are Men... and the sheep are scared